Sunday, January 19, 2014

Sunday Funnies...

One elderly couple is visiting another for supper. The two women go into the kitchen for a moment, leaving the men to talk. 

One of the men says to the other, "The Mrs. and I went to the nicest restaurant last night." 

"Is that right?" the other inquires, "What was it called?" 

"That's just it," he replies "I can't recall. "Say, what's the name of that red flower that has thorns all over it?" 

"A rose?" he responds. 

"YEAH, THAT'S IT!" he says energetically. 

He then whirls around and yells into the kitchen, "Hey, Rose! What was the name of that restaurant we went to last night!?

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The coroner calls the police to show them what has happened. 

An Inspector is sent and is taken straight to the first body. "L. Jones, 60, died of heart failure whilst making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile Inspector", says the Coroner. 

The Detective is taken to the second dead man. 

"A Smith,  25, won the lottery, spent it all on Brandy. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile." 

"Nothing unusual here", thinks the Detective, and asks to be shown the last body. 

"Ah," says the coroner, "this is the most unusual one. R. Johnson, 30, struck by lightning." 

"Why is he smiling then?" inquires the Detective. 

To which the coroner replies: "Thought he was having his picture taken".

"Mr. Quinn, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce court judge said, "and I've decided to give your wife $775 a week."

"That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. 

"And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."

                                       GO SEAHAWKS!!!!!

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